I went to the Phoenix 500

hellojed

Things I did while in Phoenix:

  • Slot Machine Gambling
  • Ate a good burrito
  • Saw an Indycar Race
  • Saw a NASCAR Race
  • Rooted for the slowest car 

Slot machines

Somehow the group I was with got it in their heads to go to a Casino within Phoenix city limits. We ended up at the Desert Diamond, and it was a much more pleasant place to be in since no smoking was allowed. My strategy was to withdraw $100 and sort of light it on fire and accept that I would not see that money again. 

I sat down at a 3 Little Pigs themed slot machine and preceeded to win $70, which then slowly ticked back down as I kept pressing the "spin" button. I pressed the "cash out" button and the machine spit out a slip I could use at an ATM that would give me $70. I thought about how I was "Up" but we weren't going to leave yet, so I kept gambling with the money I had taken out. 

We tried different slot machines but the 3 Little Pigs one ended up paying out more than the others. At the end of the night I left with $25 less than I started with. 

but I finally got to experience the sensation of "I just got to win it all back" even when the stakes were as low as this, I kept shoveling money into the slot machines hoping to win it back, and it didn't actually happen. The moment I did win a little bit felt kind of wild, but I began to feel the addictive effects of it immediately. I think gambling should be illegal. 

Indycar

Phoenix raceway is south of Phoenix across from a dry river valley and nestled next to a bunch of mountains, it's very scenic. We walked maybe 2-3 miles in the hot Airzona sun to the looming race arena ahead of us and could hear the Indycar engines buzzing from that far away. 

Once you're inside the complex beers cost $15. I rented a race headset and radio which allowed me to listen to the radio chatter of drivers and their teams, this was partially because they function as hearing protection but it's impossible to talk during these events so you need something to listen to.

Indycars fly by so fast that it's impossible to tell one from another most of the time. The car numbers are all on the wing, but in the stands they are very difficult to make out. Mercifully our seats were in the shade, but that wouldn't be the case tomorrow. 

It was harder to cheer for any particular driver due to me not knowing any of the drivers or teams. At some point a driver got into the lead after slicing someone else's tire apart with their wing, but they hit a wall in the process, over the radio they described how the car was vibrating. The race was nearing the end so everyone in the crowd was hoping he could pull off a win, but then the other racers ended up passing him and he dropped 12 places. A friend of mine informed me the driver from the "wrong" team won which is why everyone in the crowd bood when they crossed the finish line. 

Nascar

We returned the next day to sit in the 11th row and the 11th seat, picked by my friend who was rooting for the man of the hour in the #11 car - Denny Hamlin

NASCAR had their final championchip race in Phoenix last year. Last year Denny Hamlin - who is the winningest driver in NASCAR history without a championchip win - and who's dad was terminally ill at the time - ended up leading 90% of the race with the fastest car on the field. Only for another car to crash with 4 laps to go, forcing the entire field to pit, and in the process getting passed by dozens of other cars and losing the championchip at the last possible moment. This was a return to the scene of the crime, as it were. 

Phoenix has a subtly different layout from most oval layouts. It has a "dogleg" turn that drivers can cut. Just after restarts the entire field will fan out and compress back into the track, and this sometimes leads to spectacular wrecks. It's unnerving to watch because the cars are doing it at 150 miles an hour and are literally bumping against each other. 

What is nice about watching a NASCAR race live is you can more or less see the entire track without camera cuts or commecials. You can see in real time cars pull away or catch up to one another or make passes. 

Denny manages to lead a few laps before the race is over, but finishes 5th. 

Phoenix

Phoenix itself is a sort of Backrooms of a place - it goes on forever in every direction - it's sort of a nowhere place where everything you want is within a 5 mile radius. There's always a Shake Shake nearby. There's always a Raisin Cane's nearby. It is only apartment complexes, suburbs, minimalls, as far as the eye can see. 

The one local place I went to the entire time was Taco Boys, a resturant within walking distance of our Air BnB. Me and a friend walked there the first night, both of us hungry after eating only junkfood from airports. Inside they had a charcoal open flame grill and the World Baseball Conference on. I ate probably the best burrito I ever had.