The great seattle moped rally

Every two years Seattle hosts a moped rally, inviting clubs from around the country to experience the joys of the pacific northwest, riding hundreds of miles over a weekend on very tiny bikes, and sitting in the sun for hours waiting for the ferry to arrive. This year I rode two bikes and both broke multiple times. I rode from Seattle to Tacoma and onto Vashon Island. And along the way I had my recent aquisition in my pocket: a Kodak Charmera

It looks like it's 2003 again in these photos. It has a 1.6 megapixel sensor. There is no lens and it has a very small LCD screen. You won't know what kind of photos you have until you're home and looking at a real screen. 

I liked using it. I had it in my pocket and clipped to a loop next to my pocket so it wouldn't get lost. People would ask about it any time I had it out. I think it's a great way to take very unproccessed, candid, and honest shots that represent moments in time. They don't look great but they look great. 

I met so many people who's names I forgot. But they were all really friendly and excited to ride. 

On Friday we had our street tour of Seattle, which went over routes I'm mostly familiar with. But this time we have a hundred bikes with us at a time which attracts a lot of attention. Part of the ride included a loop around West Seattle, with the city coming into view around the hill as the sun was setting. Part of the rides is to give out of towners a tour of the town and Seattle's skyline is very dramatic when viewed from West Seattle this way. 

My bike, a 1977 Puch Maxi, ran great up until the very end when it started running very poorly. I suspected that the condenser, which is a part of the old points ignition system, had given out and I would need to replace it. I weighed doing that in the morning, or riding my OTHER bike 60 miles down to Tacoma instead, but that would require changing the transmission fluid. So I went home after the party and worked on my bike at 1:30 am. 

The next morning the person who I was hosting that weekend was sweeping my own floors with a broom when I woke up. They had cleaned my house in between them waking up and me waking up as gratitude for staying over. I have done this in the past as a guest but as a host I'm like "whyyy are you cleaning my house? it's fine! the generosity is the reward" but I let them go on because it probably made them feel comfortable. 

The ride to Tacoma started at 11, which is pretty early in moped time. And the start point was in Georgetown, which is a 20 minute or so ride south of Seattle. 

Georgetown is right next to the Boeing airstrip, so planes were flying very close to the tops of the buildings. It felt like a mini version of Kai Tak. 

My bike ran fine until just south of Des Moines. I replaced my brake pads years ago but the new pad material does not have the same strength as the old ones, and even after several years they never quite work the same. This means I have to brake longer and harder to stop. At one turn a sudden left appeared and I squeezed very hard and felt a snap - my rear brake cable had failed and I only could use my front. I made a very stupid decision then - I was not going to stop and get the breakdown van. I was going to ride all the way to Tacoma on a single brake cable. I was very gentle and generous with braking for corners, so it was fine, but I also accepted if the other cable snapped I would be completley and utterly fucked and it would be my fault. 

And then my bike suddenly got louder because the end of the baffle fell off the exhaust. This is mainly a sound supression thing and doesn't affect the performance, but it made it very uncomfortable to ride the rest of the way. But, after several hours, me and the rest of the stragglers made it over the Tacoma bridge and into the city. I was very tired and over it, having also been in the sun all day. Somehow the group I was with missed where the meetup spot was and went to north Tacoma instead. When we finally reached a stop I took off my helmet and attempted to fix the brake cable.

I carry a collection of random bolts and nuts in my toolbag for situations like this, I realized I could make simple pinch bolt to act as a knarp, threading a bolt through my brake lever, and using a nut and washer to squeeze the brake cable. It took two tries but it worked. I bought earplugs from the gas station to save my hearing. 

Then at the stop I realized we were near an auto parts store and the can of Sapporo I was drinking was thick enough to be a makeshift baffle. However the ride was about to leave so I had to be fast. I bought the worlds worst utility knife and 2 hose clamps. I cut the can in the parking lot and tried to secure the baffle, but the ride was leaving and people were on their bikes and I didn't clamp it down hard enough, so it fell off after a few blocks. 

I was with a group of lost riders trying to make our way to the Tacoma Vashon ferry, it was hot and sunny and I was already pissed when they pulled into yet another gas station for yet another gas stop, which meant waiting around some more after they were so hasty to leave the last stop. I looked in the trash can and saw the top of a can, I fished it out and it was one of those big Red Bull cans, and it was the near exact diameter of my exhaust, so in the parking lot I cut up THAT can and slipped it on my exhaust with my last hose clamp. That stayed on the rest of the ride, but the back pressure of the exhaust kept pushing the entire contraption slowly off, but not badly enough to fall off. It made the bike sort of quieter, I no longer needed earplugs, plus people really liked that I basically had fixed my bike with trash. 

AND THEN it was time to lay in the sun for an hour while we waited on the ferry because we missed the last one. I found a tree and laid down in the grass in the shade and it was probably the best moment of the rally for me. A ladybug landed on me and i held it on my finger for a moment. It was nice to just rest after hours of GO GO GO GO GO GO DONT STOP DONT STOP. 

The ferry ride was short but long enough for a single drink of sparkling water. The breeze on the water was refreshing to feel after so many hours stuck in the heat of the sun. I was positivley grumpy. 

And then one final ride from the ferry to the end spot on Vashon. Vashon has some of the best roads in the state, with very few stop signs and zero traffic lights on the entire island of about 40k people. My bike felt like it was very tired and so I was I, and I had to keep it easy on the brakes because I was very worried about breaking them again and going off into the woods. At one point on this ride I considered stopping and running off into the woods and just living there if it meant not riding anymore. 

But we made it to Den of Pin, Vashon's excellent pinball bar, which is full of old electromechanical machines, and I was able to rest again. The island is very sleepy and has a lot of very good local businesses to persue. They have a great pizza joint with a very cozy bar in the back, where I had an uncommonly good Old Fashioned. 

Then we set up camp. A member of our club is also a member of "The Fraternal Order Of The Eagles" which is a very old social club that's still around, and membership means that they opened the grounds for us campers. After a long day of riding I set up my tent, got very drunk on the last of the free beer, then crawled into my tent.

When I awoke a breakfast possee was rustled up, I was still a little dizzy from the previous day and I wasn't sure if this was a hangover or my inner ear was still recovering from my broken baffle. i had a very very good breakfast bagel sandwich, and then a sort of ok breakfast sandwich at the resturant next door. 

My task for Sunday was to drive the Chase Van. When people break down on these rides they're stranded until someone can pick up their bike and the rider. Usually these are separate vehicles. I drove the van on Sunday because I knew I would be too beat up to ride, and I've also wanted to drive the people chase van - you meet people from the rally you wouldn't other wise get to - because you're brought together via circumstance.

For six hours my copilot would read chat and program the van's GPS to point me where I needed to go. I picked up around 8 people which meant driving around the entire island in a HUGE van with bad brakes and bad steering and a lot of people in the back. Periodically we'd drop people off and then pick up more people, and towards the end we got pizza for everyone in the van since it had been a long day and we were all very hungry. 

And along the way I saw a Citroen 2CV

With the ride ended and everything packed there was only one thing to do but ride all the way back to Seattle. This is shorter than via Tacoma, but it was long enough that 2 more people broke down and had to get picked up. 

With that done and the van dropped off, there was only one thing to do: get hammered and party. Add a Ball was hosting Monsterwatch and Destrends who were on their first US tour from Austrialia. I went insane in the mosh pit. The lead singer crowd surfed twice. 

And last but not least someone did a massive burnout in the parking lot

Then I took a Lyft home like a responsible adult and drank and entire bottle of gatorade before going to sleep. 

And the rally still isn't done. There's still Moped Monday. I fixed what was wrong with my Puch (or so I thought) the day of, and also changed the transmission flud because I had broken in a new clutch. But during the ride I was having ignition problems again, and then my coil fell off the bike. Two cars and my friend on a bike stopped and we were able to get it going again, and I limped it back to Add A Ball for the third time this week. 

and now the rally is really really done for real. I broke down 3 times and drove a van. and I hosted someone. It's Wednesday and now I'm no longer tired.